End User License Agreement
By using this site, you affirm your consent to the following agreement:
We track everything you click on, hover over, or drag across while you are interacting with this website. We know your Internet Protocol (IP) address, and can probably cross-reference that back to your full name, Social Security Number, and date of birth. We would then be able to correlate that information with your current, former, and future addresses; employers; home, work, and cell phone numbers; credit lines; and bank account balances.
We also know the last website you visited and the one you go to after you leave here.
If you fill out any forms, participate in any polls, send us a message via our Contact Us page, or otherwise manage to provide any personal information to us, we'll keep that on file for as long as we feel like without regard to who might have access to it. We may share it either deliberately or inadvertently on this or other web sites, in print, in person, or using any other technology, whether it exists now or in the future.
You might think that this information retention policy could result in abuse.
You'd probably be right.
In fact, we're not at all afraid to call up your significant other in the middle of the night to reveal your surfing habits, to gossip about you with your friends and enemies, and to point at you and laugh if we encounter you in public or private. Our children and neighbors, random burglars, and other complete strangers will probably come across all of your personal data and use it for their own nefarious purposes.
So don't do anything stupid.
Also, this site has links to other sites, over which we have no control and for which we accept no responsibility. Those sites will likely have even more egregiously intrusive EULAs than this one.
Furthermore, the advertisers on this site use a variety of methods to track your behavior before, during, and after your visit here. We have no control over what they do with your personal information, and specifically disclaim any liability for what they do.
By interacting with this site, including submitting any forms, clicking on or hovering over links, or viewing site content, you represent and warrant that you have all rights, power, and authority necessary to grant the rights to the information described or contained within these Terms. Because you alone are responsible for your information, you may expose yourself to liability if you post or share information without all necessary rights.
You retain any ownership rights you have in your information, but you grant us the following license to use that information:
When information is created with or submitted to this site, you grant us a worldwide, royalty-free, perpetual, irrevocable, non-exclusive, transferable, and sublicensable license to use, copy, modify, adapt, prepare derivative works of, distribute, store, perform, and display that information and any name, username, voice, or likeness provided in connection with the information in all media formats and channels now known or later developed anywhere in the world. This license includes the right for us to make your information available for syndication, broadcast, distribution, or publication by other companies, organizations, or individuals who partner with us. You also agree that we may remove metadata associated with this information, and you irrevocably waive any claims and assertions of moral rights or attribution with respect to this information.
This policy incorporates by reference both our Terms of Service and our Privacy Policy. In the event a court of competent jurisdiction holds any provision of this policy unenforceable, the remainder of the policy will remain in full force and effect.
Finally, we reserve the right to change this policy at any time and in any way, without notice to you or anyone else.
So don't rely on this policy to stay as friendly as it is.
